Introduction
Moving into a shared space can be challenging, especially if you’re not used to living with roommates. But as long as you put in the work upfront to set boundaries and expectations, you’ll have a smoother transition and more peace of mind in the long run. Here are some tips for successfully cohabiting with other people:
Benefits of living with roommates
Living with roommates can provide a variety of benefits. One of the biggest advantages is the cost savings associated with sharing living expenses. Rent, utilities, cleaning supplies, and food can all be Split, making the overall cost of living much more manageable. Additionally, roommates can provide companionship and a sense of community. Living with roommates can also provide an opportunity to learn valuable social skills such as conflict resolution, communication, and compromise.
Finally, having roommates can provide more security in the home and make it more difficult for intruders to break in.
Tips for living with roommates
Write down your expectations.
You need to have a clear understanding of what you want from a roommate. What are you willing to give? Are there any expectations that are non-negotiable? Are there things that are dealbreakers for you? Write them down.
For your roommates, the same question applies: What do they expect out of this roommate relationship, and what is non-negotiable?
For example, my roommate thinks it’s her right as my roommate to use our shared kitchen whenever she wants, regardless of if I’m already in there cooking myself. There were many times when she would walk into the kitchen while I was cooking and force me out by telling me, “I don’t care about your opinion on this.” That kind of behavior isn’t okay, so clearly, my expectations for her involved not doing these things (and more).
Talk about your living habits.
Talk to your roommates about how they feel the house should be run. For example, if you’re a night owl who likes to work into the wee hours of the morning and sleep late, you might suggest that it would be better for everyone if guests didn’t come over after 10 p.m., or perhaps agree on designated quiet hours. On the other hand, if your roommate is an early riser who gets up at 5 a.m., you could agree not to stay up past midnight so as not to disturb them.
If there are certain things that bother one of your roommates and don’t bother another — say, if one person hates loud music while another loves it — try making an effort by playing quieter music when they’re home and being respectful of their personal space when they’re working or studying in their room (or vice versa). If one person needs more privacy than others but is willing to compromise by sharing some living space with roommates frequently enough that they still get some peace and quiet occasionally, then this arrangement will work well for everyone involved.
However, if two people have different needs for privacy but can’t seem to find a middle ground without upsetting each other too much (i.e., one person needs alone time every day after work but won’t allow any other family members/roommates to visit during those times), then it may help matters if each person has their own bedroom rather than sharing one large living space together.
Be clear about any rules that are important to you.
Once you have your roommate situation set up, it is important to be clear about any rules that are important to you. If they are someone who eats a lot of junk food and leaves their dishes on the counter all day, then it’s important to let them know how much you will appreciate it if they clean up after themselves. If they’re someone who insists on keeping the lights on at night or listening to music while studying for exams, then it’s important for them to know that this is something that bothers other people in the house and should therefore be avoided. Being clear about these things will help prevent any problems down the road.
Don’t take things personally.
The first thing to do if you’re struggling with the feelings that come up when living in a shared space is to try to remember that your roommates are not always trying to make you angry.
When we feel like our emotions are being attacked, it can be extremely easy for us to become defensive and hold on even tighter to our own emotions. This will only cause us more pain in the long run because we will have developed a hostile relationship with someone who may be trying very hard not to upset us. It’s important for everyone involved in these situations (even if they aren’t around) that everyone feels safe and supported by their roommates.
If a problem arises, address it right away.
If a problem arises, address it right away. Don’t let it build up and then explode in an argument that leaves you both feeling uncomfortable living together. If something bothers you, talk to your roommate about it (in a calm and friendly manner) or write them a note explaining how their behavior has affected you and asking how they feel about changing their behavior going forward. This is not the time for passive-aggressive notes or passive-aggressive comments when they’re not around because this will only escalate the situation.
If there are multiple issues in play, address each one as soon as possible so that both of you can focus on fixing one issue at a time rather than trying to solve all of them at once by getting frustrated with each other instead of working together on solutions.
Don’t gossip about your roommates with other people.
This is a common complaint among roommates who are living together for the first time. It can be challenging to figure out how to go about living with other people, especially if you’re not best friends. You want them to be happy and comfortable in their own space, but you want your space as well. The best thing you can do is try to get along with each other and compromise when possible.
If there’s something that bothers you about your roommate(s), address it directly with them instead of talking about them behind their backs or complaining about them to other people around campus or at work (and vice versa).
Ask for help when you need it.
It’s okay to need help!
There are going to be moments when you’re not sure what you’re doing, or why. It’s okay to ask for help and it’s okay if the person helping you is better at the thing than you are. If one of your roommates is a caterer, don’t feel shy about asking them to make dinner occasionally so that you can spend time getting better at cooking (and hopefully making food for yourself).
Additionally, if someone else does something in your home that bothers them or makes them uncomfortable—like leaving their suitcase open on the floor every day—it’s fine for them to approach their roommate about it directly. You may not want everyone knowing how long it takes before your socks dry out after taking a shower; it might seem easier just to put up with whatever annoying habits other people have around the house until they either go away or get fixed themselves.
Remember that no one is perfect.
You need to remember that no one is perfect. Your roommates are going to make mistakes, and you will too! You’re all human, so there’s bound to be a miscommunication or two. Also, don’t expect perfection from your roommate—while it may be in their nature to clean up after themselves or keep their things organized, they might not always do so perfectly.
A good rule of thumb is that if something bothers you enough that you want it fixed, say something about it first instead of just taking care of the issue yourself (unless it’s an emergency). For example: if someone leaves dishes in the sink for days on end before finally cleaning them up themselves when they run out of room in the dish rack; or if someone puts their shoes everywhere instead of leaving them neatly by the door every day… These could be considered imperfections because these habits are annoying for some people but not everyone would feel this way about them!
There’s nothing wrong with having different styles—this isn’t just limited to living situations either; everyone has different personalities and preferences! Just remember that whatever your situation may be at home (or work), there will always be people who have different opinions from yours–you can’t please everyone all at once!
It’s not always easy to live with people, but doing these things can help you make it work!
When you move into a shared living situation, it’s important to remember that you are all adults. You can be mature and respectful while still knowing what’s important to you and allowing space for others’ needs as well. If your roommate is messy or loud, don’t be passive-aggressive; rather, talk about the issue in a calm way so that everyone knows where they stand. Having boundaries will help everyone get along better!
The key is communicating early on about things like household chores, sleep schedules, private spaces, quiet time, and large groups so that no one feels taken advantage of later on down the road. It’s all about compromise!
Conclusion
Living with roommates can be a lot of fun and help save money on apartment expenses, but it can also be stressful. The first step toward making your situation work is to have clear expectations for everyone involved and then talk about them in advance. This way you can all be on the same Page before anything goes wrong!
Remember not to take things personally and ask for help when needed – no one is perfect after all!
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